Episode 13

Tanner gives an update on the ICE saga. In short, he’s a moron. Chris is back from Europe and he’s here to say something profound: Europe is Europe. Chris was quizzed about Canadian gun laws at the border while Tanner was given the third degree about his job. Arby’s has a new off-the-menu sandwich called the Meat Mountain, and it’s exactly what you think it is. Chris reports on what the local news in Ferguson, MO is concerned with – breastfeeding. Chris and Tanner go down a dark, dark path thinking about the possibility – however abhorrent and remote – that a woman, at some point in history, has been, ahem, ‘excited’ by a baby during breastfeeding. Chris and Tanner play a game of Chart Toppers focused on the biggest movies and singles of this week in the years 1988-90, and finish up the show wondering where the Barbarian Twins are and what their own celebrity monikers would be.

Music courtesy of Emperor X

Run Time: 1 hour 4 minutes

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Episode 12

Welcome to the Yuck Factory everyone – your number one source for goofs, gaffs, chuckles, and laughs. Chris went to the bar and made fast friends…again. Tanner marvels at Chris’ desire to talk to strangers, and Chris was punished by the great lord above by having to look at a random woman’s vagina pics for it. Meanwhile, Tanner spent the weekend in Skyrim. Two dicks kicked a squirrel off the Grand Canyon and Chris and Tanner are horrified but also try to understand their uncomfortable laughter when reading the story. Tanner can’t believe no one is talking about Obama admitting that the US tortured people in the wake of 9/11 and thinks it exposes the myths of democracy. Yeah, so this is a comedy show? The show ends with the return of Chris and Tanner’s favorite game Chart Toppers. This time they must guess the top music singles and movies at the box office this weekend in 1985-87.

Music courtesy of Emperor X and Jeremy Soule with some Back to the Future soundtrack and Peter Cetera karaoke for good measure

Run Time: 1 hour 10 minutes

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Episode 8

Tanner brings back a fashion report from The American South from capri pants to “action sandals.” He also got hit on outside a bathroom by a woman that looked like a Real Housewives cast member. Chris went to the DMV and loves old people who dress up to do mundane things. Tanner and Chris’ friends from the Extra Secret Podcast asked on Twitter about the origins of the “good sized bowl” that Chris’ mom requests her water-destined lemon wedges to be placed in, and Chris gives some clarification. In the news, Monty Python is reuniting but it sounds disappointing. Chris also offers his history of sketch comedy. China has created a sperm extraction machine for guys having trouble coming up (get it?) with a sample. Chris debuts his new game Rank and File and challenges Tanner to rank 12 of the biggest action stars of the 80s and 90s in terms of the cumulative toughness of their characters.

Music courtesy of Emperor X

Run Time: 1 hour 13 minutes

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Episode 7

Tanner is creeped out by kids’ emotionless machine learning of language. He’s also CUP CRAZY – the World Cup, that is. Chris thinks back on fatherly wisdom or the lack thereof. A rich asshole ate nearly ten percent of China’s tiger population and Chris and Tanner fantasize about murdering him with a battle cat. A man drove cross-country with his dead girlfriend and 91 year old mother. Tanner brings back Listless and reads the top ten weirdest magazines. Chris and Tanner go head-to-head again in a follow-up to Episode 6’s first ever Chart Toppers battle, testing each other’s 90s music and movie knowledge.

Music courtesy of Emperor X and Mariah Carey.

Run Time: 1 hour 15 minutes

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Episode 6

Chris got a speeding ticket and wonders if he’s now been suckered into some scheme by the city of Detroit to torture him for all eternity. Tanner wonders if Chris was going so fast he traveled in time. Chris is also prepping for his upcoming European trip by watching videos of gypsies thieving and plane crashes. Tanner enjoys how student debt removes any joy of getting a raise by adjusting and keeping him in a life of financial precarity.There was a conference for alien abductees and Chris and Tanner ponder the peculiar mindset of someone who believes they’ve been visited by aliens. Burger King is changing its slogan after 40 years and it’s a good example of the hellscape of 21st century life. The show closes with a brand new game called Chart Toppers where Chris and Tanner must guess the biggest hit movies and songs of the early 90s.

Music courtesy of Emperor X and Silk.

Photo credit Alicia Holder

Run Time: 1 hour 11 minutes

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Episode 4

Tanner has a theory that all 90s songs, albums, and artists can also double as pet names for genitalia. Think about. Chris is depressed because he’s not feeling well and resents you, yes you, for your happiness. Tanner dreads work potlucks and wonders if others get the same anxiety over them that he does. Dracula’s castle is up for sale and a Satanic mass was schedule to be held at Harvard. Jonathan Fleming was in prison for 25 years and just found not guilty. The justice system and death penalty are bullshit and racist. 1989 –  the year Fleming went to prison – might just have been one of the most pivotal years in history, and the indisputable best year for TV debuts ever. EDITOR’S NOTE: Tanner forgot to mention that SEINFELD also debuted in 1989. Chris closes out the show with a follow-up to his IM conversation from episode 1. In this conversation, he embarks on an ill advised conversation with “Emily” – the person he’d recently broken up with. As usual, one person is still in love and the other has clearly moved on. But which one is Chris? 

Music courtesy of Calloway and Emperor X.

Run Time: 1 hours 22 minutes

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